The passing of our beloved Benjamin

I'm finally working up the courage to post the sad news. On Wednesday evening, our beloved chocolate lab, Benjamin, had to be put to sleep. At nine and a half years old, we thought he had so much life left in him. What we thought was just a little flu bug last week though, turned out to be something far more serious. On Wednesday when I came in from mowing the lawn, Benny was breathing funny and refused food, even when I offered to spoon-feed him. I called my mom and explained what was going on. Then when I tried to take him outside so he could go potty, he staggered and almost fell over, leading me to believe that he had another ear infection which was messing with his equilibrium. When I got him back in the house, he started crying and Ben NEVER cries (he was always an incredibly quiet dog). So I called my mom at work again and she came home early to help me get him to the vet. I really believed that we would get to the vet's office, he would be diagnosed with another ear infection, given some medicine and we'd have him safely home by 5:30. But the vet just looked at us sadly after listening to his heart and checking his vitals and told us that he was in critical condition. It was as if someone had just poured cold water over my head. He was in pain and his heart was shutting down. It was so traumatic watching my beloved Benjamin fade so quickly and even worse to hear his labored breathing. Walking out of the vet's office that night was one of the hardest things I've ever done, especially since I went in never dreaming that he had congestive heart failure. I loved that dear dog so much. I've always been more attached to animals than to people, but Ben was so much more than just a wonderful dog. Through everything that has happened over the past 9 and a half years, he has been such a stable, constant, cheerful presence in our lives and the past seven years (after Grandpa gave him to us) he has never ceased to be the most faithful companion; our house seems so empty and awful now that he's gone. I've cried and cried and cried. Everything is so dark and depressing right now.